Become the CEO of Your Career and Life Most people understand enterprise. It is a job, education, household, spouse, lover, kids, friendships – all separate departments in the enterprise you call life. If we label these differently it is production, research and development, administration, partnerships, human resources, payroll, and customer relations. Enterprise is strength. You own it. If you are as enterprising as the CEO of a successful business, you can use your enterprising strength to start a business venture of your own, manage your family, and build a corporate career or any combination of achievements. While every person can be enterprising, not everyone is entrepreneurial, and there is nothing wrong with that. To forge your corporate path, act like a CEO who is plotting the purchase of another company. First, research the top levels of your division to identify positions that match your passionate vision and explore other divisions for jobs of interest. Next, plot a course from that position you aspire to attain back to where you are now, pinpointing one or more positions at every level that will lead to your ideal career. Keep your vision bold, without concern for obstacles. Study people who currently hold those positions. People advance because of relationships, so build relationships at all levels. Do not only look at advancement, but look for ways in which your knowledge and expertise can grow and benefit your company or the company you work for. Make sure to investigate new skills. Some skills are developed through education and some through experience. The first thing you must do is commit a plan to paper. This is your Strategic Life Plan. Start with your passionate vision. Define your core values (or mission statement); assess your strengths; and appraise your challenges. Set target dates for completion. Make sure to get your hands dirty. The best leaders lead by example. Start with the 5 promises: #1 – I will live and work a passionate life. #2 – I will go for it or reject it outright. #3 – I will take on action step a day toward my passionate vision. #4 – I commit to being a success student for life. #5 – I believe I really can do anything. Developing yourself doesn’t happen overnight. Be patient and make sure to celebrate your success no matter how big or small.
Self-Induced Stress Stop the madness! Some people are just so driven that they actually create their own stress. Not only do they create stress for themselves, but for others around them. You can often observe this in parents of young children who are so busy projecting their dreams onto their children that they create a tidal wave of stress throughout the house. These people are so obsessed about being “the best” at everything that they lose sight of what life is about. They rarely enjoy their lives and make sure that their children also do not enjoy the lives they have, either. They can be found heading up PTA drives and in a dozen other activities. People often look at them with envy because they seem to have it all and are so ambitious. In reality, they have very little. Ambition is good – driving everyone around you nuts to validate your life because of personal insecurity, is not. We can choose to live with self-induced stress and continue on a merry go round of anxiety, or we can slow down and eliminate some of the stressors in our lives. Are you experiencing self-induced stress? How do you feel when you come home from work – are you happy to come home or do you feel that you are just coming home to a life of chaos? Many people say that they are more relaxed at work than they are at home. If you cannot relax at home, when can you relax? Do you even know how to relax? Some people actually feel guilty when they are “doing nothing.” People today tend to expect way too much from themselves and very few people know how to relax. As a result, they are raising children who also do not know how to relax. What have we got to look forward to except a bunch of future stressed out adults? The only ones who will benefit from this are the pharmaceutical companies who are busy cranking out better and better medications for stress. Allowing self-induced stress to control your life or even enter your life is like volunteering to jump out of a plane without a parachute. Other people will watch you appear to soar, but in reality, you will be in a lot of pain that could end up fatal, even if it is just metaphorically. Some signs of self-induced stress are the following:
- You do not have time to talk to friends on the phone because you are always “running around;”
- Your children are involved in no less than two activities a week to which you provide transportation;
- You look forward to the day when your local fast-food chain offers charge accounts;
- Your kids do not know what mashed potatoes are unless they come in a fast-food package;
- You feel you can relax at work better than you can at home;
- You feel guilty if you have nothing to do;
- You eagerly count the days until (pick one) Soccer, Basketball, Baseball or Ballet season ends.
If you identified with one or more of the above situations, chances are that you are experiencing some signs of self-induced stress. Superman and Wonder Woman were fictional characters – stop trying to be a superhero to yourself and learn how to relax. If you are ready to conquer this self-induced stressful life, contact me for your free initial consultation for Personal Growth Coaching.
Ever noticed we are never really quiet inside our own minds? Try it out. When we sit in a corner, away from others for a break, we keep on thinking. We can’t stop ourselves from thinking. As long as the body feeds us sensory data from the environment, we respond to the environment. In prehistoric times, man relied on his instincts to survive. Scientists have called this the fight-flight response in which a person instantly chooses to fight and overcome his adversary or run away to survive. The body, perceiving a threat, increases and opens up its stores and energizes the necessary cells to prepare for a fight or a run. The body becomes more alert, the muscles get all the blood they need, sugar and fat are burned quickly. In modern times, the fight-flight response is still useful in a minimal capacity for situations against robbers, muggers, or prize fighting. Soldiers and people on the violent path still need this even more. The only way to overcome these extremely stressful situation is to train yourself to see it another way. A “Can Do” attitude reflects this outlook. To make the most of life, people have to accept living to the fullest. Having a “can do” attitude shows that life to you is: – A journey. Don’t worry about the destination, enjoy the process. People are expected to make mistakes. If it does happen, why make a big deal? Accept the mistake, learn the lesson and move on. – Not to be taken too seriously. Life taken too seriously only makes the uptight person more stressed. Laugh, have fun. Accept that nothing is perfect. – Not about survival, but about living well. The “can do” person knows why he is here because he has taken the time to know his purpose. Whether that purpose is to teach college football, or to be president of a Third World nation, the “can do” person does it with two feet on the ground and his eyes fixed on the future. – Half full, not half empty. Life depends on how you see it. A “can do” attitude is quite the optimistic realist. An optimistic realist knows that a lot of things can go wrong because the world is like that, but that does not stop the person from trying out opportunities to take him to better places and better opportunities. Fear is not allowed to dictate action, only warn. Logic is not used to find reason not to do it, but is used to achieve the optimist’s objectives. – Is not alone. “Can do” people know that people are more than willing to help them. A “can do” person is an agent of change, not hesitating in helping others along the way. Others are also on their way to become better. Help yourself by helping others. Develop trust and friendship, but never be surprised at the ambiguity when you encounter it. Accept it as part of the process. A “Can do” attitude can definitely take you places you never dreamed of.
It’s no surprise that so many people today are in a state of uncertainty. We’re going through massive changes in the economy, the world, and life in general, and many of them are unprecedented. Yet, we know that with all of this change, there’s opportunity. There’s a chance here for our lives to be better than they’ve ever been.
All too often, we get overwhelmed and things feel out of control, and we go through our day-to-day lives with a great deal of apprehension and uncertainty. We start to become managers of our lives, doing our best to get through the day and survive.
Anthony Robbins says “we’re not made to merely survive – we’re made to thrive.” We all have a calling within us. We must put our fears aside for something that’s greater than us.
We must be the creator of our lives. Stop dreaming and live your purpose – your passion. Invest in your future. Learn the skills you need to live a life that meets – no exceeds – your potential.
No matter what area you need help in, if it isn’t provided here for you, find a place that you can obtain the skills needed to create the life you desire. Just put one for forward – otherwise you will stand in the same place forever!
The fear of rejection may have haunted each one of us at one time or another. It may be caused by our fear of being and living alone, too much dependence on other people’s perception of us, lack of confidence and inability to control our own life. Fear of rejection is a state of mind that makes a person feel inadequate, helpless and worthless. It inhibits a person from doing or saying things because of the fear that other people might not accept him or disapprove of his actions and words. A person who is so concerned about what others may think of him could make his own life miserable because he can no longer speak his own mind nor do things that he would normally do on his own. The fear of rejection can paralyze a person and discourage him from being productive. A person’s uniqueness disappears the moment he puts primary emphasis on what others want him to be. A person too caught up with pleasing others will start to emulate other people from the way they dress and the way they behave in society. This usually happens to young people who crave attention and acceptance but do not yet have enough basis for self-acceptance. This is detrimental to a person’s growth because there is no more room for self-expression, only of self-denial and the thought of pleasing others. A person who fears being rejected can be characterized as:
- A person who acts without confidence. A person who is not sure of himself will tend to imitate others and keep himself from trying new things. Such lack of confidence will ultimately make such person unhappy and bitter.
- Keeps opinion to himself. A person who is not vocal about his perception of things may be having trouble with rejection. He may keep from voicing out his opinion for fear of being criticized.
- Usually depressed. A person who does not have the freedom to speak for himself and to express his wants will soon become depressed and will no longer have a love for life. He will tend to act like a remote-control robot that cannot make his own decisions.
- Confused about his true identity. A person who has fears of being rejected will end up confused about who he really is. This will lead to an identity crisis and will make him angry at himself and at other people for no reason at all.
- Lack of self-esteem and self-worth. A person who gives more importance to what others may think of him does not have much faith in himself to start with. This lack of self-esteem may have resulted from feelings of rejection instilled in him by his family or friends.
A person who fears rejection will ultimately be rejected by the people he wants to please and who love him dearly. A person who has the tendency to please other people will soon get sucked into a difficult cycle of rejection. His behavior will keep the people he cares about alienated from him. He sees this as a rejection and then the cycle goes on and on. We must all find ways to deal with rejection to break this vicious cycle. For more on personal growth, check out the links above.